Friday, October 23, 2009

The following handwritten letter was found crumpled up on the seasonably cool marble steps of McKinley Hall:

Dear Lisa,

Swear to god, you can’t share this with anyone! So like last week I had an embarrassing gyno appointment with a new female doc. Wanting to freshen up beforehand, I sort of borrowed some of your expensive vag perfume you keep hidden in your wig case, except I wound up spraying glitter hairspray up my cooch. When she took a peek inside, she said, “Mmm, fancy!” Damn, it must’ve looked like a confetti kaleidoscope exploded inside a sugar wall planetarium. Weird too, because I’d been listening all day to a new Beatles tribute CD to virginity called Lucy In The Sky With Hymens.

My favorite song is “Self-Denial Fields Forever,”


Song of the Day:
Robin Thicke, “Sex Therapy”

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