Friday, May 16, 2008

The following handwritten letter was found crumpled up on the noble grounds of McKinley Hall:

Dear Lisa,

Hmm, maybe you didn’t hear me when I whispered under my breath a block away standing next to a biker dude obnoxiously revving his Harley, but yes, you were right—silk-screening t-shirts made entirely of ice cream was a bad idea. Not only were they cold and sticky, but they totally melt in the trunk in like minutes. Speaking of bad ideas, I probably shouldn’t have taken a class of special needs children with severe peanut allergies on a field trip to the George Washington Carver Museum & Lickable Wallpaper Cafeteria. Unexpectedly a few kids ballooned up like giant pumpkins and were hastily rolled away by a gang of monotone midgets in peanut costumes singing cautionary tales. Geez, you try to do something nice and look what happens.

Probably should’ve taken the kids to the Nail Gun & Ebola Emporium instead,


Song of the Day:

James Pants, “My Girl"

No comments: