You know him as King Kong, but all the ladies call him King Dong. That’s 'cause he’s hung like a freaking Stegosaurus. Okay, so he’s not a man, but like lots of men that go bananas for blondes in white dresses (who can really scream their heads off), he’s just a misunderstood antihero with a great smile. Hey you’d be pissed too if you were captured from Skull Island, transported in chains halfway around the globe to New York City and forced to appear as a circus attraction on Broadway. Unfortunately, the relationship between Man & Ape has always been rocky (just ask Charlton Heston or Jane Goodall). Some would say it was beauty that killed the beast, yet everyone knows it was actually airplanes shooting at him in the 1933 original and helicopters in the 1976 remake starring Jessica Lange. Ape or not, he’s still all Paco Camino Man.