Tuesday, July 31, 2007

The following handwritten letter was recently discovered on the sun-drenched marble steps of McKinley Hall:

Dear Lisa,

This summer camp sucks big-time ass! My drawing class is sketchy at best and I caught my chewing professor feverishly masticating at lunch. Say at what point do you stop using rectal thermometers as novelty drink stirrers? My gut says when spicy tacos attack, but my ass says “Gut, goddamit--I get all your shit and I’m fucking sick of it! Why don’t we send some processed cheese the other way out for once?” Hmm, this might sound crazy, but maybe I've been hallucinating on toxic pine bark laced with bad-grade heroin which I've been unkowingly burning as incense at my exclusive kick-ass crochet house parties.

Dog fighting is bad, but after-hours cat juggling and fish-teasing is just horrific,


Song of the Day:

Van Halen “Act Like It Hurts” demo

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