Monday, April 09, 2007

The following handwritten letter was recently found crumpled on the unseasonably cold marble steps of McKinley Hall:

Dear Lisa,

I’m so wet and excited! I’m showing off my shaved pussy in the upcoming Cat Fancy swimsuit issue. Clitoris is stroked and stoked! My cat I mean. Cripes what were you thinking? Think we’ll go with the Farrah one-piece. Anyway, forget taking your metrosexual llama out for a good time in the inner city forest—it’s infested with ghetto bears, rabbit hos and deer pimps. Hey Cheapco accepted my schematics of car seats for four-legged dogs and airplane storage compartment carriers for kids. Um, oh yeah--sorry about the explosive farting in the fish tank thing. Who knew that chunky, half-digested taco chum could kill marine life? AAAHH! My screaming class is shout out loud, shriek at the top of your lungs excitement!

Kristin


Song of the Day:

“Gin and Juice” Richard Cheese

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